It took a couple nine years after they tied the knot and two kids later, to finally open a wedding gift. Their present did not arrive late nor did it get lost in the mail. In fact, Kathy and Brandon Gunn, took the box with them every time they moved houses.
The gift came with a specific instruction; “Do Not Open Until 1st Disagreement.” Kathy admits they have had plenty of arguments and times where opening the package was justified. Yet, they chose to keep it sealed just in case a bigger and more serious fight would warrant it.
It didn’t take a huge, epic fight or a crisis in the relationship to finally get the two lovebirds to see what was inside the box given to them by Kathy’s great aunt Alison. Kathy shared her story on Love What Matters’ Facebook page and what she and Brandon learned in the process of keeping their wedding gift unopened for so many years.
The couple met in Kalamazoo, Michigan. They are the proud parents to a six-year old girl and a three-year-old boy.
While discussing their favourite wedding gift over a glass of wine, the one they never opened came to mind.
When they finally opened the box they found two separate notes addressed to Kathy and Brandon separately, wrapped around cash. In the note, Brandon was instructed to use the money to buy flowers and a bottle of wine.
Kathy was informed to buy a pizza, shrimp or a favourite dish for her and Brandon. The note went on to say to get the bath running.
A bath kit, vase, and crystal wine glasses were also included in the box.
Kathy has learned life is not always easy but being with the person you love, makes it worth it. “Brandon is my constant. No matter what struggles I am faced with, I know that I can always count on him to be in my corner and me in his,” she says.
“Tonight, we tucked our kids in bed and my husband and I enjoyed a glass of wine on the deck. We were talking about how excited we were to attend an upcoming wedding in Kalamazoo (where we met and went to college) and discussing what would be the perfect gift for the newlyweds. So, I thought back to our wedding day (nearly 9 years ago) and tried to recall the gifts that had meant the most to me. The funny thing? The gift that meant the very most was still sitting in a closet… unopened.
On our wedding day, my husband Brandon and I received a gift from my Great Aunt Alison. On the plain white box was a card that read, “Do not open until your 1st disagreement.” Now, there had obviously been plenty of disagreements, arguments and slammed doors throughout our 9 years. There were even a couple of instances where we both considered giving up… but we never opened the box.
I honestly think that we both avoided turning to the box, because it would have symbolized our failure. To us, it would have meant that we didn’t have what it takes to make our marriage work – and we’re both too stubborn and determined for that. So, it forced us to reassess situations. Was it really time to open the box? What if this isn’t our worst fight? What if there’s a worse one ahead of us and we don’t have our box?!? As my Great Uncle Bill would say, ‘Nothing is ever so bad that it couldn’t get worse.’
All along, we assumed that the contents of that box held the key to saving a marriage – an age old trick – unbeknownst to us rookies. After all, my Great Aunt and Uncle had been married for nearly half a century. So, we thought the box would save “us” – and in a way it did. That box went beyond what I believe my Great Aunt had intended. It was by far the greatest wedding gift of all.
For 9 years (and three moves) that box sat high on a shelf in various closets gathering dust, yet it somehow taught us about tolerance, understanding, compromise and patience. Our marriage strengthened as we became best friends, partners, and teammates. Today, we decided to open that box, because I finally had a realization. I realized that the tools for creating and maintaining a strong, healthy marriage were never within that box – they were within us.”
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